August 17

Understanding Self-Control, a skill must for Success in Life

Self-control is often used to describe a favorable character trait in people. The word is used frequently, but what exactly is Self-control, and why is it important? Let us today try and understand self-control in detail and also we will understand what we can control and what we cannot control. So let us start with understanding the meaning of Self-control.

Understanding Self-control:

Dictionary Meaning:

the ability to control oneself, in particular one’s emotions and desires, especially in difficult situations.

In other words, Self-Control is an ability to monitor and regulate one’s own emotions and desires in any tempting situations. It is also an ability to regulate and follow one’s own thoughts under any circumstances.

Quotes on Understanding Self-control:

The difference between want and need is self-control.
When you have control over your thoughts, you have control over your life.
Knowing yourself is Wisdom, controlling yourself is Strength.

Benefits of Practicing Self-control:

Benefits of Understanding Self-control

What we can control:

There are so many things and emotions which we all can control, yet we all think and discuss rather get upset about what we cannot control. So here is the list detailing what we can control.

This list is just an example of things that we can control, in addition,  you can create your own list of things and emotions which you can control on the basis of this list.

  • Your Thoughts
  • Your Attitude
  • Best utilization of your time
  • Your Mindset
  • Your Beliefs
  • What you put in and what you bring out of your mouth
  • Your Feelings
  • How many times you Smile in a day
  • Saying Thank You
  • Attentive Listening
  • Trying new things and learning new skills
  • Grateful for things and people you have
  • How much information you share with people
  • Stop Judging
  • Your Reaction to everything

What about the things which we cannot control and what to do for those things:

Lest us first see the example of things in this category:

  • Other People’s Thoughts
  • If People Likes or dislikes you
  • The passing of time
  • How other people treats you
  • The outside situation, like the current Pandemic
  • Other People’s actions
  • Other People’s beliefs and thoughts
  • Whether people like, love, understand or accept you
  • The exact outcome of anything
  • When you will Die

Now if you carefully read this list, you will understand that these things are either universal truths or are in control of other people whom you interact with. So here you need to understand that you cannot control universal truths and you cannot control hundreds of people with whom you interact. In fact, you cannot control a single person. What is in your hand is your reaction, your attitude for those things, or people whom you cannot control.

Here I would advise you to read a post of mine which talks about Bad News and Good News in Life, here is the link:

Bad News and Good News in Life

Understanding Self-control, Conclusion and Way Forward:

By far we have understood what is Self-control, benefits of practicing Self-control. In addition to that we have also seen in life, there are many things which we can control and we need not have to worry about what we cannot control.

Now the next thing which comes in mind is that how to practice Self-control. For Self-control, the most important thing is Willpower, so along with other ways to improve and build Self-control, we will discuss in detail about Willpower in the next post.

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Posted August 17, 2020 by Manish Malu in category "Knowing self", "Life", "Values

About the Author

By profession I am a Chartered Accountant, working in MNC. Book Reading is my passion, I normally read Books related to Self-development, Motivation, Leadership, Spirituality etc and reads blogs and watch Videos on these topics. The sprit to share the learned knowledge, brought me here so that I can write blogs and inspire myself and others with my work.


  1. Pingback: Boost your Willpower to make yourself mentally strong - Knowing self

  2. By Harsimran kaur on

    Thanks for sharing for this valuable information regarding self control… i must implement these in my life….

  3. By on

    Manish, Thank you for posting helpful information. I would like to add that while willpower is hard to maintain, forming good habits makes it easier! All the best! Cheryl

    1. By Manish Malu (Post author) on

      Absolutely true… A big thing in life can be achieved by changing a small habit.

      First your change a habit then habit changes your personality.


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