Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus


“Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” is a popular self-help book written by John Gray, published in 1992. The book explores the differences between men and women in relationships and provides insights into understanding and improving communication between the sexes. While it is difficult to provide an exhaustive summary, I am trying to give you an overview of the key ideas regarding how men can handle women or women can handle men based on the book:

How men can handle women:

Recognizing differences:

The book emphasizes that men and women have inherently different communication styles, emotional needs, and ways of dealing with stress. Men need to acknowledge and accept these differences rather than expecting women to think and behave like men.


Men are advised to understand that women often need to express themselves without being interrupted or offered immediate solutions. Instead of trying to fix problems right away, men should actively listen and provide emotional support. Additionally, using “Martian” direct language without being too vague or assuming women will understand can help bridge the communication gap.

Emotional support:

Women tend to seek emotional connection and validation. Men should be attentive, show empathy, and be understanding when women share their feelings. Providing emotional support can strengthen the bond between partners.

Respect and appreciation:

Women appreciate feeling valued and respected. Men should express their appreciation, show gratitude, and acknowledge the efforts and contributions of women in their lives.

Giving space:

Men often need periods of solitude or independence to recharge, while women tend to seek emotional closeness. It is important for men to understand that women may desire more frequent communication and quality time. Balancing personal space with emotional connection is crucial for a healthy relationship.

Love languages:

The book suggests that men and women may have different ways of expressing and receiving love. Men are advised to identify their partner’s primary love language, such as words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch, or receiving gifts, and make an effort to speak their partner’s love language.

How women can handle men:

Appreciation and admiration:

Men appreciate feeling respected and valued. Showing genuine appreciation for their efforts, achievements, and contributions can boost their self-esteem and strengthen the relationship. Women can express admiration for their partner’s abilities, qualities, and actions.

Give space when needed:

Men often need alone time or moments of solitude to recharge and reflect. It is important for women to understand and respect this need for space without taking it personally. Allowing men to have their space can lead to a healthier dynamic in the relationship.

Direct communication:

Men tend to prefer straightforward and direct communication. Women should try to express their needs, concerns, and desires clearly, avoiding indirect or subtle hints that may be easily missed. Using clear and concise language can help men understand and respond more effectively.

Offer support and solutions:

When men face challenges or problems, they appreciate practical support and solutions. Women can show their support by actively listening, offering advice or suggestions, and being willing to collaborate on finding solutions. Providing a sense of partnership and teamwork can be beneficial for both parties.

Foster independence:

Men value their independence and autonomy. Women can encourage their partner’s individual pursuits, hobbies, and personal growth, respecting their need for autonomy and space. Supporting their interests and goals can help create a balanced and fulfilling relationship.

Respect their need for silence:

Men often retreat into silence or become less talkative when they are processing thoughts or emotions. Women should understand that this is a natural response for men and not necessarily a sign of disinterest. Giving men the space to process their feelings without pressuring them to talk can lead to healthier communication and understanding.

It is worth noting that while “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” offers insights into common dynamics between men and women, it presents generalizations and may not apply to every individual or relationship. Understanding and respecting the unique needs and preferences of one’s partner should be the foundation for any successful relationship.


The Rubber Band Theory:

One example presented in the book is the “Rubber Band Theory.” According to this theory, men have a natural tendency to pull away emotionally and seek solitude when they feel overwhelmed or stressed. It is compared to a rubber band stretching away. In contrast, women tend to desire emotional closeness and connection when facing challenges. Understanding this difference can help men recognize that their partner’s need for space is not a rejection, but rather a way for them to recharge. Men can then allow their partners the space they need and, when they are ready, reconnect with them.

Cave time vs. Talking time:

Another example highlighted in the book is the concept of “Cave time” and “Talking time.” Men often retreat to their “caves” or personal space to reflect, think, and recharge. During this time, they may prefer solitude or engaging in activities that help them relax and recharge, such as watching TV or pursuing a hobby. Women, on the other hand, tend to use “Talking time” as a way to connect and share their feelings, thoughts, and experiences. By understanding and respecting these differences, men can communicate their need for cave time to their partners, while also recognizing the importance of talking time for women. This understanding can lead to better communication and a stronger bond between partners.


In conclusion, “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” provides valuable insights into the differences between men and women in relationships, offering guidance on how to better understand, communicate, and handle these differences. The book explores various aspects of male-female dynamics and provides practical strategies for building stronger connections and resolving conflicts.

Understanding and appreciating the unique perspectives and needs of both men and women can lead to more fulfilling and harmonious relationships. By implementing the principles discussed in the book, individuals can develop effective communication skills, cultivate empathy, and foster a deeper sense of connection with their partners.

If you are interested in gaining further knowledge and insights into the dynamics between men and women, I highly recommend buying and reading “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” by John Gray. It is a popular and influential book that has helped many individuals navigate the complexities of relationships and improve their interactions with the opposite sex.

Here is the Link to buy this book:

Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus

Cognitive Bias: Breaking Free from the Mind’s Traps

Cognitive bias refers to the ways our brains can sometimes take shortcuts or make mistakes in our thinking. Lets deep dive into it.

Cognitive Bias Introduction:

Cognitive bias refers to the ways our brains can sometimes take shortcuts or make mistakes in our thinking. It means that our minds have tendencies to jump to conclusions or rely on certain patterns of thinking that may not always be accurate or rational. These biases can affect how we perceive information, remember things, and make decisions.

Cognitive biases can affect various aspects of our thinking, including perception, memory, attention, and decision-making. They often occur automatically and unconsciously, influencing how we interpret and respond to information or situations.

Looks difficult to understand?

Lets understand it better, There are numerous types of cognitive biases, and they can manifest in different ways. Here are a few examples:

Confirmation Bias:

The tendency to seek, interpret, or remember information in a way that confirms pre-existing beliefs or hypotheses while ignoring or downplaying contradictory evidence.


Imagine that a person, let’s call them Alex, strongly believes that a specific brand of smartphones is the best on the market. Alex has used this brand for years and has always been satisfied with its performance.

Now, Alex comes across an online article claiming that a different brand of smartphones has recently released a new model with innovative features and better overall performance. However, instead of objectively considering the information, Alex unconsciously exhibits confirmation bias.

Alex searches for more information about the new smartphone model. but primarily focuses on sources that support their pre-existing belief that their current brand is superior. They selectively read positive reviews, testimonials, and comparison articles that confirm their existing viewpoint. They may even disregard or downplay any negative information or criticisms about the new model, simply because it contradicts their belief.

Availability Heuristic:

Let’s say you’re trying to estimate how common car accidents are. If you recently saw a news report about a car crash, you might think that car accidents happen all the time, even though they are relatively rare.

Your brain relies on the easily available information (the news report) rather than looking at the bigger picture, leading to an availability heuristic bias.

Anchoring Bias:

Imagine you’re shopping for a new phone, and you see an advertisement for a phone that’s $1000. Even if other phones have better features and are priced lower, your brain might anchor on that $1000 price point and consider it as the standard.

It can make it harder for you to consider other options objectively because you’re anchored to that initial information.

Bandwagon Effect:

Have you ever noticed that when a lot of people start doing or liking something, you feel inclined to do it too?

That’s the bandwagon effect. It’s when you adopt a belief or follow a trend simply because many others are doing it, without really thinking about it critically.

Overconfidence Bias:

Imagine you’re taking a test, and you’re absolutely sure you answered all the questions correctly. You might feel very confident about your performance, even if you made mistakes.

That’s overconfidence bias, where you have more faith in your abilities than what is actually true.

Framing Effect:

How information is presented can influence our decisions.

For example, if you hear that a glass is “half empty,” you might think of it negatively. But if you hear it’s “half full,” you might think of it positively, even though it’s the same amount of water.

The framing effect shows how the same information presented in different ways can change how we perceive it.

Hindsight Bias:

This bias occurs when, after an event has occurred, we tend to perceive it as having been more predictable than it actually was. We may believe that we “knew it all along” when, in reality, the outcome was uncertain or unpredictable.


Let’s say there is a popular reality TV show competition where contestants perform various challenges. Contestant A is known for being particularly skilled and has consistently performed well throughout the season. Contestant B, on the other hand, has had mixed performances, sometimes excelling and other times struggling.

Now, imagine that Contestant A performs exceptionally well in the final challenge and ultimately wins the competition. After witnessing this outcome, people might exhibit hindsight bias when they say things like, “Oh, it was obvious that Contestant A was going to win all along!”

Hindsight bias refers to our tendency to perceive events as more predictable than they actually were, but only after knowing the outcome. It is characterized by the belief that we “knew it all along” or that the outcome was inevitable when, in reality, the situation was uncertain or had multiple possible outcomes.

More Cognitive Bias:

Before you have any cognitive bias on this article let me stop here and take your feedback. Let me know if I need to create one more post to share more examples of cognitive bias.

Social skills – simple guidance on how to develop it – changeyourlife (

Principles of Mathematics and Application in solving Life’s problems

How can you solve your problems in Life by applying Principles of Mathematics. Yes, problem solving principles in Maths and Life are same.

In my previous post Mathematics of Life, Learn from Math symbols we have analyzed how mathematics Symbols teach us about life, In today’s post we will analyze the applicability of few Problem-Solving principles of mathematics in our life.

We are going to learn how we can apply principles of Mathematics in our life and how can we solve our life’s problems and challenges by applying these Mathematics principles.

Whether it is Maths or Life you need to start to Solve a problem:

Principle 1: You need to start to solve a math problem; you cannot have all answers in mind and then start.

Application in Life: Most of the time, you cannot predict where you will end up. Just go for it—you will figure the rest out along the way.

Principle 2: One-step at a time and you will solve it.

Application in Life: If the problem is too challenging, start smaller. Break the problem into small parts and try solving small parts. It applies for achieving Goals also, to achieve a long term Goal we need to break it into smaller short term Goal. The little things make all the difference.

Principle 3: There is more than one way to solve a math problem.

Application in Life: Life rarely gives you black and white choices, and that is fine. Often, you will find yourself having to choose between multiple good options. Once you start solving it everything will fall in place.

Importance of Equation in Maths and Life:

Principle 4: LHS = RHS Keep your equations balanced.

Application in Life: You need to keep balance between Personal and Professional life. Make time for the things you love and keep adjusting. This equation of life should always be balanced.

Importance of asking questions:

Principle 5: Do not be afraid to ask questions.

Application in Life: You will not always get to the answer on your own. Ask for help! Faced with a challenge or problem in life? Lean on your near and dear ones for help. The ability to admit what you do not know is a crucial life skill.

Importance of Logic and thought process in solving Problems:

Principle 6: A forgotten negative sign or a small miscalculation can lead to a completely wrong answer.

Application in Life: In life also, pay attention to the details. In any situation or any relations or even when you are at work, you know how important it is to pay attention to small things.

Principle 7: Logic and thought process behind the answer.

Application in Life: In life also we need to analyze the situation, we need to understand the logic and thought process behind every situation in life, before taking any action on the same.

Learn from Mistakes and Improve whether it is Math or Life:

Principal 8: You will make mistakes. Even the greatest mathematicians need to rework problems repeatedly.

Application in Life: Failure is not the end. If you get the wrong answer, keep trying. You will make mistakes in life, but you will learn from them! Learning from mistakes and bad experience is an important part of our life.

Journey to reach the solution or destination is very important:

Principle 9: The answer might be simple, but the steps to get there may be very difficult and lengthy.

Application in Life: Even if you have an end goal in mind, the journey there will not always be easy and like Math, we will be very happy once we reach the destination and we will appreciate our journey.

Principle 10: Sometimes math can be challenging and occasionally be frustrating, even to the best and brightest.

Application in Life: Likewise, life will get tough but stay patient, be resilient, meet the challenges, and it will certainly pay off!


So we have seen that there are so much similarity in Mathematics and Life, when it is about problem solving. Hope you have enjoyed the post and you will apply the principles of Mathematics in solving your problems in life.

What is Love, forms of Love and which is Best

In Life, we get love from different people and relationships. So today let us analyses what is Love, what are the different forms of Love and which is best.

In Life we get love from different people and relationships. So today let us analyses what is Love, what are the different forms of Love and which is Best.

What is Love:

I think love cannot be defined in a single paragraph without any context to the person whose love we are trying to define. So let us understand What is Love in the context of the related person.

What is love of Mother:

Do you know why Love is Blind? Because our Mother started loving us before seeing our face.

5 missed calls from Mom

Son: I have told you not to disturb me when I am at work.

Mom: Waiting outside your office as you forgot your lunch box.

Let us understand Father’s Love:

A Good Father is one of the most unsung, upraised, unnoticed and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society.

They say men don’t love dolls, but when they’re blessed with one, they can’t stop fiddling with her.

The reason why daughter love their dad most is that there is at least one man in the world who will never hurt her.

What is Love of Brother:

A brother is a friend given by nature.

There’s no other love like the love for a brother. There’s no other love like the love from a brother.

Sister’s Love:

There can be no situation in life in which the conversation of my dear sister will not administer some comfort to me.” – Mary Montagu

There’s nobody in the world that knows me better than my sister.” – Tia Mowry

Friends Love:

A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words

Understanding Partner and Partner’s Love:

Love is not about finding a good partner. It is also about being a good one.

A great relationship is about two things, first find out the similarities, second respect the differences.

Which Love is Best:

When I came home in the rain,
My Brother Asked: Why you Didn’t take an Umbrella.
Sister:(Advised) why didn’t you wait till rain stopped.
Father(Angrily): Warned! only after getting cold, you will realize.

Mother: while drying my Hair, said,
“STUPID RAIN! couldn’t it wait, till my child came home.”
Thats MAA (Mother)

You may also like to read Understanding Life by Quotes

What is Love, Forms of Love and which is best

Knowing what is Fear is important than how to overcome

We normally tend to a short term solution of a problem and same we do with fear. We try to find tips on overcoming fear without Knowing what is fear. Read the full post.

As the heading itself suggest that Knowing what is fear is important than how to overcome fear. We will focus today on understanding what is fear.

What is Fear:

Dictionary meaning of Fear:
“An unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm”

Here two important word that you need to note is “Emotion” and “threat”. Therefore, fear is an emotion and it is caused by a threat, which means that the event has not happened and even the actual happening or not happening of the event is not even certain.

Fear is nothing but a story, which we tell ourselves over and over again.

Knowing what is Fear and Understanding it in detail:

Consider a Situation; if someone sticks a gun in your face, you will most likely have a lot of fear because you are imagining what he or she will do and what the effect will be for you.

Now consider the second situation; if you are feared in general that just walking down the street that someone will pull a gun on you?

Let us evaluate both the situation and understand the fear,

In the first situation, Danger is in front of you and you are imagining the outcome of this, which may happen at any time.

Whereas in the second situation nothing has happened, you are not only imagining the outcome, moreover, you are imagining the Cause itself i.e. Danger.

In our life most of the time our fear is of the second category.

One more perspective which will help you in knowing what is fear:

We do not touch fire, why, are we afraid of fire or we know that we will burn our hand if we touch fire. Try to understand the difference in both the scenario; I am trying to simplify the thing, which we often confuse. So not touching the fire is not due to fear, here the danger is real and we know that we will burn our hand if we touch fire.

Reason of Fear:

You need to understand we are not afraid of the situation, we are afraid of the outcome of the situation.
Let us understand this, Say for example someone says He/ she is afraid of heights, this means that they are not afraid of heights, they are afraid of the outcome, what if they will fall down. Again, the outcome is not universal truth like in the example of fire; it is just imaginary, which only born in our mind.

Let us further evaluate this understanding; here is the list of Top Ten Fears in the Life:

Something Bad Happening
Getting Hurt
Being Judged

Read more about these fears in this link. Moreover, once you read about these fears in details, you will understand that these are just created in our own mind in some imaginary situations while we think of some future outcome.

What I am trying to demonstrate here is that all these fears are “Fears” because we are afraid of the outcome. The outcome is a future thing, so understand that Fear is born due to our thinking of Future outcomes.

Let us go back to our example and understand Fear in some more details:

Now let us go back to our example, where someone put a Gun on your face. Here we are facing our Fear, which fears, which we were imagining that what if someone pulls a gun on my face. If we are facing our fear then why we are afraid of.

Here you need to understand that, we do not fear as a result of someone has put a gun on our face, we cannot be afraid of that because that is happening in the present. Then why and what are we fearing for. Here we are afraid of another imaginary outcome, which is Death. What if he will shoot me dead?

Overcoming Fear:

As at the start I have told you that Knowing what is Fear is important than how to overcome it. So I am not giving you any tips to overcome a particular fear as your fear is different from my fear, I will give you a general principle to overcome fear.

When we will detach ourselves from the Outcome / Results (which is future) and focus on the Task (which is the present) we will not be afraid of anything.

Bhagavad Gita also say Karm Karo fal ki chinta mat karo.

Bhagavad Gita 2.47 translation: “You have control over performing your act, but you are not entitled to the fruits of action. Never be a slave to the outcome of an act but still, you should not be demotivated to perform your action.

If we follow this principle, we will not be afraid of the outcome and once our focus will shift from Outcome to Action or performing duties, fear will automatically disappear.

Conclusion: Knowing what is Fear is important than how to overcome

Let us conclude the topic with few wonderful quotes:

“Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death.”
— James F. Byrnes

“Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear.”

Read my post on Self-Awareness

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